mixed feelings

today is another day when i have mixed feelings..some good happenings and some sad results.... sigh... well, early morning, went shopping with mum...manage to buy a pair of shoes, tshirt and some facial stuff.. kinda on the shopping spree to buy those list of 'things i need to bring back to sabah'...kinda to the extend of buying a new biggy luggage too, the one i first took over to sabah.. hehe... so, it was happy mood in the morning.....

then, when i reached home, came a msg from the person whom i've been 'arguing' for weeks... the good thing is the person DID msg me after i hantam kaokao about things i wana say after so long... the sad thing is the news that our most hopeful sponsor for the health promotion turned down our appeal for sponsors without any apparent reason which mean, we aint gonna get any sponsors... darn... kinda expected ler... just no luck ler... sigh... another news i received was our two superb lecturers will be gone by the time we start our new semester.. sigh.. why cant my uni/sch just extend and plead for them to stay...??? they are the real professors that will guide us thru... sigh.. wat ass luck again... so sad that they wouldnt even teach us in 2nd year for a tiny bit...

okies..then...at nite... another mix feelings again... called up a fren whom i didnt talk to since meeting him in dec to ask some questions.... the first thing he asked and said was, 'so how are u arh??? i was so scared to call u after the msgs u sent to me, but i know sure one day u will call me...and u know..i've been keeping the msg u sent to me for almost one year dee...?"..shock as i would be when he read out the content of the msg as if i just sent a minute ago...so sorry that it affected him till this day... of coz it would have affected me the same way just like those sent by a few others to me..thou i didnt save the msg like he did, its always in my mind ler... im not sure why he said 'he gona delete me from his list due to some reasons i couldnt hear'...i told him, its his wish as its his choice..im not him and i cant do anything to stop him too... when i sounded serious like that, it scares him...but i know he wont delete me..coz he once said 'those who dont msg me will regret for life'...and he knew that very well last year..but nah, its not me to say anything... i just wana treasure those frens that means a lot to me all these while before its too late... anyway, the last few lines were a bit too formal for me.. "thanx for calling...and i know u remember me always..." of coz i will always remember those that i care and love... and u were NEVER once useless to me, my dear fren... only wish u understand all those msgs i sent... life is just a journey that we are taking one step at a time.. last time, i had always wish that we would be in the same uni, but nah, its fated that we are to be separated... u are in UM and im in UM+S.. hehe...u have ur life, i have mine... u are enjoying things in uni, with someone by urside who is able to share ur ups and downs and vice versa.. yeah, no doubt u are always in my prayers... its just a matter of how our frenship are bonded... we might not be that close anymore, but i guess its not the end... u know it too...

anyway, going over to bm tmr...going to st.anne's church, didnt go for quite some time dee... and then, shopping again ler...still so many things not yet buy and i think my supp credit card sure burst dee... hehe..luckily my dada is going... hehe...okies... 8 more days before i say bubye to pg...not sure when coming back...end of this year...or nex year???